Impotence
If there is not a medical reason for failure
to get an erection, then it may be due to the fact that you are not
as enthusiastic about your partner as you may have been before. Do you(
or/and your partner) still want the relationship to continue? Do you(
or/and your partner )want someone who is more sexually exciting, but
are actually afraid to end this relationship and find that.? There may
be quite a lot expectation and frustration and unreality around this
area which need to be sorted out. If this is not the case and you really
want to be with that person, then anxiety about performance is generally
the saboteur. and you are dealing with a sort of performance anxiety.
Natural sexual desire is not something you engineer,
it happens by itself. An erection takes place spontaneously, it is not
created or sustained by conscious effort. The whole process has got
nothing to do with thinking.
If you have one experience of not getting or
sustaining an erection then it may cause anxiety the next time you have
sex , you may begin to trigger anxious thoughts about whether or not
it's going to work. Soon this may become a learned response and draw
in very powerful feelings of loss of self esteem which are an even greater
turn off. The thinking mind starts to tell you that this most natural
thing is actually a danger area. The logical outcome of this is that
you stop having sex because of the intense fear of failure.
All of these thoughts that trigger around the
anxiety have actually got nothing whatsoever to do with the real situation
of intimacy with your partner, in fact they are stopping you from being
in direct contact with your partner, since your attention is being drawn
away from physical contact into a story about you having a problem.
Hypnosis reorients you to the natural relaxation
response that allows you to be totall;y drawn in to the powerful physical
and emotional stimulation of sex through completely letting go of the
idea of success or failure. This is actually totally available because
the reality ( as opposed to the negative story) is that there is truly
no problem here.
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